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Showing posts with label mama kats workshop. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mama kats workshop. Show all posts

May 31, 2013

Adoption is Another Word for Love - My Siblings and I


Prompt courtesy of Mama Kat's Writing Workshop
Share a story about a sibling that still makes you smile.
 I was adopted when I was a month old and I grew up as an only child.  People ask me if I remember when my mom told me I was adopted -- I don't.  For some reason I can't pinpoint the exact age at which she told me, I just know that I've always known.  My mom was never secretive or closed about my adoption, she always passed along any information that she knew.  I was always allowed to ask questions and as soon as I became a teenager, my mom told me that if I ever wanted to find my biological family she would be in full support of me.

Right before my 18th birthday I became nosy and snuck into my mom's room when she was at work.  I was on a mission to find my adoption papers to see if there was anything she had not told me.  You know, as a teenager you think your parents are always being deceptive.  Well, I found the non identifying information that my mom had and I found out some information that my mom had not shared because I never asked.  Seeing the information right in front of me in black and white gave me this strong desire to find out who I was and where I came from.  

I don't remember how I brought up the topic of wanting to find my biological family, but my mom was in full support of me.  To make a very long and drawn out story short, in June of 2003 I met my biological mother, grandmother, sister, brother and two nieces; it definitely wasn't the fairy-tale reunion that I had always dreamed of, but it was part of who I was.  There was just one thing missing, my biological mother had another daughter two years before me who she also placed for adoption -- the social worker at the adoption agency was having a very hard time finding her.  I felt almost complete, but had to find her as well. 

I was in college when my oldest sister and I decided to hire a private detective who specialized in adoption reunions to find her.  Surprisingly, it took just a day or two for that woman to find her, and she called us with all of her information.  She asked if we wanted her (PI) to contact our sister first, or if we wanted to be the first call.  I'm not sure if my sister or I decided, but we said that we wanted to be the first call to her, I guess because we didn't want her to run away if the PI called her first.  

Sitting in my dorm room, I remember calling her and not knowing what to say.  The first thing I said when she answered the phone was, "I think I'm your sister."  The worst part?  She had no idea that she was adopted.  Her parents never told her, I don't know why they never told her, but I was the one who told her she was adopted.  I felt horrible.  After she talked to her mother about it she called me back and I remember talking to her for hours.  We really got to know each other and found out that we had something else in common -- both of our adopted names were KRISTIN -- spelled the same way. 

Now, 10 years later; Kristin, Shirley and I have a great relationship.  We are definitely making up for the missed time we didn't have each other to depend on.  Kristin and I get together for lunch, dinner, shopping or movies at least once a week (or so) and Shirley and I get together once every two weeks for lunch, since we work near each other.  I never want to take for granted having my siblings in my life because I didn't have them for the longest time.  We now have to catch up on 18 years, and that's hard to do.  My sisters are incredibly important to me and any time I spend with them makes me smile.

May 25, 2013

15 Reasons I'm Awesome


  1. I'm a young and cool mom - Being 28, I am young, but I think I'm cool whether or not my kids think so! (But they do! My oldest always takes pride in the fact that I'm the youngest and coolest mom in the class. Woot!
  2. I've been through a lot and survived it all - I've had a great life so far, I'm not going to complain, but I've been through a hell of a lot.  I was bullied all of my life, I lost close friends over stupid childish bullshit, I've been through a relationship that was abusive and that mentally messed me up for quite a while, I've been through abandonment by that same person when I was 6 months pregnant and have, so far, raised two beautiful children on my own.  Maybe it's not as much as some other people have been through, but I was in a state of extreme depression for quite a while but I overcame it and am bettering myself for it all now.  I hope that I can actually grow to love myself and my life more than I do now, I'd love to be a success story for myself and an inspiration to my girls.
  3. I have two beautiful girls - That in itself is a reason that I am awesome.  My girls are my life and as much as I've been through, as much stress as I deal with and even though it's extremely difficult and exhausting to raise them on my own, I wouldn't change it for anything else.
  4. I've come to love Disney and Nick Jr shows - Disney and Nick Jr. is all that's on in my house, at any given time.  As frustrating as it is, I've learned to love them!  I now find myself walking around singing the Sofia the First theme song or the Jake and the Neverland Pirates theme song.  There are times when I'm home alone, I turn on Austin and Ally or Good Luck Charlie...it's the mom syndrome, but I think I'm awesome for it.
  5. It took a while, but I'm learning to choose my own battles.  I used to fly off the handle at the smallest thing my kids did.  Now I'm learning that some fights aren't worth fighting.  If my youngest wants to wear her Sofia the First dress to the mall, whatever, I'm cool with it!  If they decide to have a powder fight in the bathroom, it only takes a broom to sweep it up.  If my kids want to have a "camp out" in the living room instead of their rooms, go for it.  If they don't want to clean their room, there's a door that can be closed!  It feels so much better not to stress over every little thing that they do or don't do!
  6. I'm currently making up for lost time with my sisters. I met my two sisters in 2003, since I was adopted.  From 2005-2011 we really didn't talk too much and rarely saw each other.  It wasn't until after my birth mother's sudden death that we realized that life isn't promised to anyone -- we see each other at least once a week now.  I love the fact that my two sisters and I have been making up for lost time.  They are honestly the best big sisters anyone can ever ask for; I love them like we were never separated. :)
  7. I lie to my kids when needed.  I used to feel so bad about doing this but as I grew up, I realized it was an important skill to master.  "Mom, can we go to Toys R Us?" say my kids...  "Oh I'm sorry honey, Toys R Us is closed for renovations!"  I answer to them.  They ask me to drive past so they can see for themselves, because they've become wise to me.  So I drive past pretty fast so they don't notice the cars in the parking lot.   There's also this one -- "Can I have this (insert toy here)?"  They ask quite a bit at different stores.  "That's not for sale, see the sign? (Reads some bogus sign to say 'Not For Sale Yet')"  They then say they don't believe me and want me to ask the cashier.  So when I go to check out I say to the cashier, "Right? This isn't for sale for the next few weeks, correct?" (Followed by a wink to the cashier)  Usually this works out in my favor and the cashier understands what I'm trying to say. (If they're a mom! lol)  This has only backfired twice.
  8. I'm going back to school.  Despite my girls, taking care of my mom and working two jobs, I've also been back in school for almost a year to get my Bachelors of Science in Business Management. (Specialization in Internet Marketing)  It's taking me longer than normal because of everything else going on in my life, but at least I'm going to eventually get my degree.  It gives me a sense of pride to know that I'm showing my girls that anything is possible.
  9. I can entertain my kids on a budget of $20 or less.  Since we've been through the horrible slump of having no money, no TV, no internet, etc... I've learned to entertain my kids on a very limited budget.  If they ask for toys I tell them we can go to the dollar store and buy one or two toys each or tell them we'll go to Walmart and get something out of the change machines.  If they want ice cream, McDonalds has the $1.25 cones, we take walks to the park for fun or make our own crafts from things we have around the house.  Surprisingly, my mom still has a crap load of my toys from when I was a kid, we'll go up to the attic to bring a box down for them to find something new... I've gotten creative.
  10. I can sense when there's trouble in the house.  My kids swear that I do have eyes in the back of my head or that I can hear something a mile away.  Over these past 7 years of being a mom, I know when there's trouble.  If it's too quiet I know something is going on, if there's too much giggling or whispering, I know it's time to check on my kids, if they leave me alone for an extended period of time, I know they're up to no good.  The funny part is, they think I'm psychic.
  11. Showering can take less than 10 minutes.  Sometimes, in order to take an uninterrupted shower, it has to be less than 10 minutes.  I can set my kids up with coloring books, TV, toys, etc... but I know that in about 10 minutes they are going to be bored and want to bother me.   I've mastered the 10 minute mommy shower.
  12. I can decipher "Olivia Language"  Olivia is 5 years old (going on 6) but she has a speech delay.  She was in speech therapy for quite a while and made great progress, but she still has problems sometimes and gets frustrated when what she wants to say doesn't come out the way she wants it to.  I've learned to decipher her Olivia Language and can translate to anyone who doesn't understand. :)
  13. I can laugh at myself.  If  I fall in public or happen to leave my zipper open accidentally, or I do something embarrassing  I've learned to laugh at myself and crack my own joke.  I never used to be able to, but laughing is better than crying!
  14. I have my nose pierced. For some reason, I feel like that makes me a bad ass! I also have a cartilage piercing -- oooo feel the bad-ass-ness radiating from me. lol
  15. Despite my semi-low self confidence I can come up with 15 reasons why I'm awesome. Enough said!

May 22, 2013

6 Random Facts About Myself - Writing Prompt

I'm a completely random person, I will definitely pop up with the weirdest comments, questions or statements in the middle of any given conversation.  (Even if it's not on-topic!)  Needless to say, I also love to share some random facts -- God knows, I have sooooo many random facts about myself!  So let's share a few! 

 I am obsessed with cell phone cases. For my iPhone 4 I had about 15-20 cell phone cases to use with my phone.  Some people ask me if I coordinated my case for every single outfit; I didn't.  I just enjoyed having a new look for my phone every so often when I felt like changing it.  Why do I love cell phone cases? I have absolutely no idea, but I do feel like your cell phone is an expression of who you are.

 I recently bought a Michael Kors purse and I love it. This is more of a confession.  Since 2006 I have been a Coach addict.  Every single year (either around Christmas or tax refund time) I would buy myself a new Coach purse.  I have a fairly large collection of Coach purses, wristlets, sunglasses, etc...  However I saw my sister with a Michael Kors purse and I fell in love with it.  So this year, when I got my tax refund, I went to the Michael Kors store and got myself a MK purse -- I love it.  Surprisingly, I haven't changed my purse in 4 months. (Rare for me!)

 I can't live without coffee.  I have to have at least one cup of coffee a day or you don't want to be around me.  I can be a crabby bitch when I don't have coffee.  I've been asked (too often) whether I prefer Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts coffee and I'm torn.  I purchase Starbucks coffee to use in my own coffee machine at home, I prefer the taste of their coffee to brew on my own.  Though I do think Dunkin Donuts turbo coffee does have a unique flavor that I do like.  I am obsessed with Starbucks Caramel Macchiatos, that's a fact.

 I used to work in retail.  When I was younger, I worked in retail for years.  My first job was at Stop & Shop as a front end cashier, before HS graduation I started work at Sears in their Electronics department -- I hated that job, it was solely commission and I quit once I realized how tough that was.  Next, I worked at Bath and Body Works and H&R Block (at the same time) for four years, seasonal.  In between I was a photographer at the Picture People until I broke my wrist in a car accident and couldn't hold the bulky camera while in a cast.  I also worked at Aeropostale, Apple Computers (at home), Sephora and the Coach store. (Sephora and the Coach store were dream jobs for me!!)  After that, I moved into working in corporate jobs doing Social Media and SEO coordination.  As much as I do love retail, I hate being on my feet all day...I now love helping companies with promotion via Social Media and Optimization, I don't see myself switching industries for a very long time.

 I've been blogging since 1999.  I first got into blogging when I was in 8th grade.  It was an old old old website with the neon colors, iFrames, my favorite musicians as "layouts", way too much personal information and the old "webcam" on the side of the page.  It was a typical teenage blog website.  I haven't stopped since 1999, even though my websites/blogs have changed quite a bit over the years.  I don't think I will ever stop blogging because I love the relationships I have made with other moms, bloggers and businesses over the years. 

 I am obsessed with shopping at Dots.  I think they have great quality clothes for amazing prices, especially with their coupons!  I don't think Dots is in every single state, it may only be on the east coast, but if there is a Dots in your area...shop there! :)